There are many reasons why women become single moms. Some chose from day one and decided they want a baby without a man. Some men left others with no choice, alone and pregnant. The two most common causes are the death of a spouse or divorce. Sometimes, the other parent disappears, so one parent is left alone to care for them. These reasons aren’t always pretty, but that’s why we need to treat every single parent with the respect they deserve. Raising children alone is hard, and doing it because you have no other choice can make it even harder.
Common single-parent challenges
Child rearing can be difficult under any circumstances. Without a partner, the stakes are higher. As a single parent, you might have sole responsibility for all aspects of day-to-day child care. Being a single parent can result in added pressure, stress and fatigue. If you're too tired or distracted to be emotionally supportive or consistently discipline your child, behavioral problems might arise.
Single-parent families also generally have lower incomes and less access to health care. Juggling work and child care can be financially difficult and socially isolating. You might worry about the lack of a male parental role model for your child, too.
But did you know that there are more than 15 million single moms in the United States going through similar struggles? The challenges you face on a daily basis are shared by millions of women across the country, each with her own unique story and set of circumstances. Be empowered knowing that despite how you may feel at times, you are not alone in your single mom struggles.
You may feel like you have no idea how to be a single mom, but that’s not true. Every single mom has the potential change from surviving to thriving, I am here to help you unlock that potential. It won’t always be easy; in fact, it is going to be challenging and frustrating and feel overwhelming at times. But you can do it. And remember that there is no one right way to be a single mom, so don’t worry if your family does things a little differently than others. You have to determine how to be a single mom to YOUR family and discover what will help you to thrive.
Positive strategies
To reduce stress in your single-parent family:
Show your love. Remember to praise your child. Give him or her your unconditional love and support. Set aside time each day to play, read or simply sit with your child.
Create a routine. Structure — such as regularly scheduled meals and bedtimes — helps your child know what to expect.
Find quality child care. If you need regular child care, look for a qualified caregiver who can provide stimulation in a safe environment. Don't rely on an older child as your only baby sitter. Be careful about asking a new friend or partner to watch your child.
Set limits. Explain house rules and expectations to your child — such as speaking respectfully — and enforce them. Work with other caregivers in your child's life to provide consistent discipline. Consider re-evaluating certain limits, such as your child's screen time, when he or she shows the ability to accept more responsibility.
Don't feel guilty. Don't blame yourself or spoil your child to make up for being a single parent.
Take care of yourself. Include physical activity in your daily routine, eat a healthy diet and get plenty of sleep. Arrange time to do activities you enjoy alone or with friends. Give yourself a "timeout" by arranging for child care at least a few hours a week.
Lean on others. Work out a carpool schedule with other parents. Join a support group for single parents or seek social services. Call on loved ones, friends and neighbors for help. Faith communities can be helpful resources, too.
Stay positive. It's OK to be honest with your child if you're having a difficult time, but remind him or her that things will get better. Give your child an age-appropriate level of responsibility rather than expecting him or her to behave like a "little adult." Keep your sense of humor when dealing with everyday challenges.
Let's pay tribute to the hard-working women of the world who do the heavy lifting of raising kids with strength and courage on their own. Whether by choice or happenstance, these women are a village all unto themselves, and these quotes about single moms and sayings about single motherhood capture all the hard work and emotions of the experience.
"Because your child is your first priority, you're more selective, so in order to let someone into that world, they have to be really special."
"I have a great career, and I have my daughter. So what I don't have is not as important to me as what I do have."
"You always have to carry on. And you can, because you have to."
"I have time for everything I had time for before. I just have an added amazing thing in my life."
"Sometimes the strength of motherhood is greater than natural laws."
There has always been a stigma that comes along with single motherhood, but in my opinion, single mothers are stronger than most people because they have to work their proverbial parenting muscles more. So finally, we can all tuck away our "Oh, that's a shame there's no father around" pities and start shouting, "I don't know how you do it. Because as I see it, single mothers are single-handedly taking over the world!"
RESOURCES FOR SINGLE PARENTS
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